And the "Hits" Just Keep Coming

Something is wrong with the world when CNN's "breaking news" consists of this:

"Christian broadcaster Pat Robertson apologizes for calling for the assassination of Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez. More soon."

Who gives a fuck? I mean seriously. An apology for an assasination call? I assume the dialog went something like this:

Robertson: "Ya'll, I apologize for callin' for the killin' of that nice brown fella down in Venezuela, and be with the starving pygmies down in Africa. Amen."

A different article goes on to say:

"In Havana, where he had met with Cuban President Fidel Castro to discuss ties between the two countries, Chavez told reporters he had never heard of Robertson.

Asked about the broadcaster's call for his assassination, Chavez said, "It doesn't matter to me."

"I don't know who that person is," he said. "As far as his opinion of me goes, I couldn't care less.""

He then remarked, "STICKS AND STONES MAY BREAK MY BONES BUT WORDS WILL NEVER HURT ME. NYA NYA."

I Don't Know Why...

... this made me laugh. What a slap in the face, check it out:

ELGIN, Ill. -- Philadelphia-based Comcast is apologizing for an insulting epithet on a bill.
LaChania Govan made dozens of phone calls to the cable company to complain about service, but she said she was never rude.
So the Elgin, Ill., woman was shocked when her bill came and had the insult printed where her name should be.
Instead of her name, the bill had the "b" word printed on it.


I guess the squeaky wheel really does get the "grease", ba dum bum CHING!!!!

Yet Another Reason....

...to buy Mac.

WASHINGTON (CNN) -- A computer worm shut down computer systems running the Windows 2000 operating system across the United States on Tuesday, hitting computers at CNN, ABC and The New York Times.

So all it takes is a little worm to hobble the media computers? Who would've thought. I don't know about you but I had my fill of Bill Gates' software turd about a year ago with the last worm. I found sweet refuge at the Apple store. Yum.

Been A Long Time

What lop I have become. Shame on me, ignoring my poor bloggy.
Well, yesterday was my 21st birthday. Hahahaha. Not! At 26, I am no longer as they say, a spring chicken. But seriously, who ever wanted to be referred to as a "chicken" anyway? One thing I certainly am not, friends, is a chicken.

Let me fill you in, though, I had the most perfect birthday I have ever had. It was like something greater than myself looked into me and gave me everything I wanted. Yes, it was that good.

Hopefully this next year will be better than the last year of my life. I have a feeling that maybe it will.

WhAt a Pain in The AsS

Lawsuit claims exploding toilet burned man

Friday, June 3, 2005 Posted: 10:30 AM EDT (1430 GMT)

MORGANTOWN, West Virginia (AP) -- A man who says he was severely burned when a portable toilet exploded after he sat down and lit a cigarette is suing a general contractor and a coal company, accusing them of negligence.

John Jenkins, 53, and his wife, Ramona Jenkins, 35, of Brave, Pennsylvania, filed the suite Tuesday in county circuit court seeking $10 million in damages from Chisler Inc. and Eastern Associated Coal Corp.

The lawsuit claims Jenkins' face, neck, arms, torso and legs were severely burned last July after the cigarette ignited methane gas leaking from a pipe underneath the toilet unit.

"When I struck the lighter, the whole thing just detonated -- the whole top blew off," said Jenkins, a methane power plant operator with North West Fuels Development Inc. "I can't tell you if it blew me out the door or if I jumped out."


Bwahahahahaha.The horror! You know, when I was younger I used to be afraid that Ghoulies would eat my ass as I sat on the can. Poor guy. Good thing he's from Brave.

the newness ahead

Life is changing. I am moving. Away from this place and all of its history, and the past for better or worse.
It's kind of hard in some ways. I'll miss the view from the kitchen window, and how the sunlight falls through the trees at certain times during the day.
But I am off to better things. New opportunities. A new life.

i RAN AwAY

tO the vacation paradise of downtown Waikiki. I just decided on Friday that I needed to go, get out and away.
I have a lot on my mind, plud my head has been killing me since my rendezvous with the golf ball.That whole situation has me upset. I almost got my eye taken out and all they can give me is 2/3 of my pay as a WAITRESS? Anyne who has ever done it knows that the money comes from the tips, tips that aren't computed in the weekly salary. So I get a $200/wk check. How do people survive on this?
I don't want to whine but if the manager had been doing his job correctly this never would have happened anyway. Unfortunately since the company is under the Federal government's umbrella there is apparently nothing that I can do. I really sympathise with those who have had to go on workman's comp in the past.I had no idea.

JUST WHAT THE WORLD NEEDS

BURBANK, Calif. (AP) -- Serena and Venus Williams will be starring in their version of a tennis reality show.


The sisters' off-court lives -- their family, friends and the glamour of big-time tennis -- will be featured in a six-episode show that is still untitled but set to premiere on ABC Family in July.


Not that I'm not proud of the Williams sisters, but seriously. Take it as my humble opinion but Reality TV is DEAD, I tell you. DEAD!!!

31 flavors.

I remember my grandfather, who always wanted to take me out for ice cream. I remember him pacing the long wooden boardwalk, watching me play gleefully in the golden California sand as only a child can. 31 flavors. 31 flavors always seemed a world of endless possibility to me. I heard a man was murdered there. A man murdered in a place so full of possibility. How I could never come to terms with that. How sad I was, thinking about him as my sandcastles washed away in the moonlight.

Sometimes life hurts so bad that all you can do is laugh.

on the value of a black eye

And blindsided takes on a whole new meaning! So there I was, minding my own business on a sunny Sunday afternoon and out of nowhere comes a golf ball. Well, maybe not nowhere. I was working, if you can call driving a beer cart around a golf course working; when destiny gave me a golf ball. To the face.
I look like Quasimoto on a good day, but you know what? That's ok.
Reality check. Some people are born blind, right? So I guess I shouldn't bitch. In all truth I was lucky, It narrowly missed taking my eye out completely. Plus they gave me a good supply of Vicodin so I'm cherry.

kisses all

LIFE IS A DANCE

So, here I am hopped up on Thera-flu, Vitamin C, and some Robitussin thrown in for good measure. I'm smoking a Menthol Light deathstick, listening the perpetually velvet throated Patsy Cline and my dear friend Lauren is doing my hair. Strange how these things seem to happen, but I've found myself in a moment. I was reading through CNN and MSNBC, absorbing all of the crazy shit going on in this wonderful world of ours, and a thought struck me. All of this is impermanent. It's all so fluid, so intangible. We live so seriously every day for the most part. There are bills to be paid, relationshps to be maintained, and in some cases children to be reared. Still, I wonder if maybe sometimes we tend to take our lives a little too seriosly in our quest to live life the way we think it should be lived. The way that society dictates, the way our parents taught us to even.
I don't know about you, but sometimes I forget the true nature of this life I've been given. I get so carried away with detail detail details and totally forget that there is more to life.
I am swimming, but what am I swimming to?
Don't get me wrong, I am not saying that we should shirk our responsibilities or ignore what we should be paying attention to. I am just saying that sometimes it pays to step back, take a deep breath, and look at things through the eyes of impermanence.

By God

Those bitches at Go Fug Yourself have taken it to a whole new level! I would be remiss not to post their new address:www.gofugyourself.com. Game on! Enjoy it, I know I do.

STFU

Don't you just look at people flapping their mouths sometimes and think "Shut up! Damn, just shut up"! I write this about no one in completely particular, and I do suppose that I am just grousing. I'm in a bitchy mood and I'm going to take it out on you. I got a new job. I'm a WAITRESS. Yes, a waitress. I smile and laugh at jokes that aren't funny by any stretch of the imagination. I take orders. I now know all the ways steak and eggs are served. Medium rare over easy hard well done and burn it if you can, please.
The funny thing is that I like it. I do say this as I ingest my second glass of wine; but I think I really like it. Have you ever seen the Pepsi commercial. A bunch of hip looking people dancing to this song about breaking free. "I want to break free...". Well damn it if that's not how I feel inside.
I want to go dance in public fountains and get out of my car on the freeway and leave it there. I want to dance around like a total moron in a shopping mall while everyone looks on, wondering if I am having a grand mal seizure and need medical attention or if it's a new form of modern dance. I want to walk around with a huge dopey grin on my face and not have anyone ask why I'm so happy. I just am, ok. Shit, lay off!
Where are those people who through the miracle of modern technology, all show up at the same place and do something wierd for about a minute and then run away, back to their normal life. Hawaii could use someting like that. Thw world could use something like that. A happening. Totally innocuous, mindless fun.
Anyway, that's enough out of me.

kisses

Happy New Year

BOGOTA, Colombia (AP) -- Suspected Marxist rebels massacred 16 peasants, including women and children, in a remote area in lawless Arauca province, police said Saturday.

"The attack came last Friday less than an hour before the New Year arrived in the village of Puerto San Salvador, 230 miles northeast of Bogota, Arauca police chief Col. Rodrigo Palacio told The Associated Press.

He said the killers, believed to be members of the Revolutionary Armed Forces of Colombia, or FARC, accused the peasants of collaborating with right-wing paramilitary militias. The dead included six men, six women and four children."..........


Could we expect anything less from a group named the FARC??

I made it back from California in good condition. A little hung over but no worse for the wear. By the way, I highly recommend DayQuil or it's cheaper equivalent to combat a hang-over. But you didn't hear that from me cos' I ain't one to gossip.

Gears are turning in this mind of mine. Be back soon.